How do I love myself? How do I show care for myself? How do I treat everything I do with love toward the very being I am?
We tend to walk this earth like we are going to live forever, as if life is infinite. And most of this life we spend comparing ourselves to others, stuck in the duality of good or bad, better or worse, measuring our failures and successes against our family and friends. At the end of the day, all we do is reflect. Reflect our own truth, that we most often refuse to face, refuse to see. Disillusioned by our mind’s conditioning of how life is to be, we resist. Resist change, resist even our own intuition, our own inner guide.
I have been battling the concept of doing what I love, for profit. Working with esotericism and spirituality as a tradework, and making a profit appears like an oxymoron, as money has been seen like something we always fall short of. No matter how much we have it we never seem to have enough. And this darkened cloud has infiltrated our inner selves, in this constant search for more, and life suddenly has become…. Not enough.
How well do You know Yourself?
Perhaps I have underestimated my own value, and realized knowing your worth is just another way to learn to love yourself. However, loving yourself is a concept based on an unconditional formula, and knowing what you are worth in a monetary perspective sets up a sense of limit. We, therefore, become a set of ideals measured by the societal norms and placed in a box of expectations. This is how much you are worth, based on your gender, age, race, family background, and location in the world. This is who you are …
Societal Standards of Worth
We’ve become so dependent on the influences of the collective consciousness, that we so blindly became followers to it’s rules, laws, and mathematically woven paths.
You are a female and as one this is what you ought to do and not to do, this is how you must act and behave…
So who am I really? A collection of outside influences, and predeterminations of reality based on a collective mind from a past? Or am I this living, breathing organism of the now, so very preoccupied with the outside world, trapped inside thoughts, illusions created by the tricky mind, and I might as well have forgotten how to breathe.
“What a liberation to realize the ‘voice in my head’ is not who I am”– Eckart Tolle-
Recently I have been listening to Alan Watts Podcasts, and often choose to re-hear the one where he discusses the simple question:
“ What do you desire?”.
A question people are unable to answer, because they don’t really know themselves in the present moment of time, they are simply attached to a collection of memories, and influences from the past, that now defines them.
If money were no object, when the idea of profit exits the equation, the attempt to answer the question of desire;
What is it that we want? We don’t really know.
Why is that? As if there is a glitch in the program of this game of human life.
Furthermore, Alan Watts provides the example of when this question was posed to Boddhi Dharma:
“Who are you?”- he said: “I know not. Planting flowers to which the butterflies come.”
Most surely we have defined our purpose in this life, based on a social conditioning, is to create profit, to provide to a bloodline and family, to follow belief systems that we might not agree with but simply adapt to, and blindly thread the waters of life, whilst disconnecting from our own true nature. Instead of expansion, we burden with boundaries in our existence, as this is the logical way of acceptance for our mind.
“If I don’t know who I am or what I desire, how can I love myself then?”
“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”-Rumi
How do I love myself, knowing that most of these thoughts and feelings are a byproduct of energies and subjective opinions of others, a collective consciousness, the mass media, the interlinked web of humans feeding off of this ultimatum of existence. How do I know who I am, if I am only a collection of perceptions of those surrounding my daily existence?
We currently are in an up and coming spiritual awakening era, where the strangers, philosophers and weirdos of the world rise up. Something very much against the hope of the “elite” as those untamed, and unfitting are now becoming a norm. It is by far, a stretch of reality, that one day we all will be awakened to our inner higher gods, and peace shall fill the Earth, love will prosper and money will become obsolete. And even so, surely it is better to begin now, and heal within. Love within.
Love is simple. Love comes from within. It is not a logical equation of the mind, and it is not a thing to get, but something we all already have.